April 12, 2012

Have you ever been stuck while dealing with another person?

Being stuck can be likened to an iceberg- The tip of the iceberg represents the stated stuck position.  But it is what is “below” the position that makes it stuck.

We are commemorating the 100 year of the sinking of the Titanic.The Titanic was not sunk by the tip of the iceberg- It was what was lurking below the surface that destroyed the ship.

What is lurking below your and the other persons position might  sink your ability to gain agreement.

Last week I was in Santa Barbara on real estate business. Many years ago when I was a young real estate broker in Santa Barbara I was trying  to sell an investment property that the owner, a Mr. Vickers, who was desperate to sell. The building was worth in the range $475,000 but Mr. Vickers insisted that he would not sell for one penny less than $600,000- Clearly way out of line with its market value.

Strangely to me Mr. Vickers  agreed that the building was only worth $475,000 yet he would not take anything less than $600,000. When asked why he insisted on  $600,000.he remarked- “Thank you for asking Rob, because that is what I paid for the property some five years ago-and if I sold it for anything less than $600,.000 my wife and family would think me a fool and a loser to have paid so much for the property originally.”

Yes he was stuck at $600,000 due to fear of being ridiculed. In three weeks we sold the property at $600,000 – yes with some creative owner carry back financing- at no interest and a large mortgage discount at the end of five years. He was happy to sell and the new buyers were happy to buy.

When you are stuck in dealing with someone go behind the position to find out what the real issues are and see if they can be solved.

Keep flying and soaring

Rob